Wednesday, May 13, 2009

One day among many

This may be the most difficult time yet for Kay and all of us in a different sort of way. The time of the diagnosis was intense, difficult to fathom, and exhausting. Then the surgery, early recovery, complication after complication with the biliary drainage issues, and then the start of chemotherapy. Now Kay is doing pretty well, tolerated the first course of chemotherapy very well, and can help herself somewhat around the house. This leaves much more time to think. Think about how everything is different now. How the plans, dreams, and expectations for the short term and long term are all different and really uncertain. For Kay how discouraging it is to hurt a part of every day, to be so limited by her lymphedema in ability to be out of bed and on her feet for more than brief forays, and to just feel bored much of the time. That combined with her scalp aching in the prodrome to her impending hair loss, clothes not fitting, and her whole body just feeling different all combine to being spirits down. Sometimes it feels like the days are just dragging by and the battle ahead is daunting.

Despite this Kay remains strong. The down moments are brief, and she and we are really trying to live every day to its fullest. Today Scott Bailey visited, Kay went out to lunch with Jean before Jean left to return to Portland. We are watching the Mariner's extra inning game vs. Texas. Friends have been wonderfully supportive, we feel blessed by the excellent medical care Kay is getting, and are praying faithfully for God's grace and healing.

Pray for endurance, patience, and healing.



Deb said...

Kay and Ed - thank you for sharing so honestly and eloquently. I think of you both often and marvel at the strength, grace and beauty you continue to display through all of this. Kay - I hope you know if you need to talk, or if there's anything I else I can do - I'm always ready.
Stay strong. Be at peace. XXOOXX

albesullivan said...

When we are younger, we think we are facing our biggest challenges, with careers and raising families. So much to accomplish, it seems. But the true challenges come when we are faced with serious illness and disabilities. Can we face the challenge of finding peace amid the turmoil and uncertainties? Can we control our mind, even though we cannot control our body? We look to great athletes to inspire us to greater physical prowess. But who are our heroes for rising above a storm such as you face? Show us the way, Kay.

adbowsal said...

I am cleaning out three closets in preparation for the big 50 and I seemed to have buried my phone somewhere. It has been lost since Friday. I remember the last call I made but fear the dang thing is Gone.
I am missing you and want you to know the party is so informally planned at the last minute that somehow we are already pleased to simply contact friends and family. Love you and share your what now feelings! Ed puts it so well and I think you will have to become more of a home body for a while. We just made a wall of crafts next to Caroline's bed. She wants to weave, make a rug, crochet, and keep knitting. I told her about Cranbrook, my dream school tonight. The kids keep watching youtube of a twelve year old having stream of conciousness very entertaining for them. Love you so much, Mary

adbowsal said...

...and Ed I imagine the living room turning into a study for writing, sketches of birds taped to the windows, hand written poems strewn about the fireplace. Watermarks of Ice Tea glasses marking up the big table with a legal pad on one side and small file boxes all about. Your new calling. Eventually going on book tours.

The whole upstairs could be one big studio. xo Mary

Rachel M. said...

I am Janie's friend in southern California, and I wanted to share a verse with you that was shared with me this past Monday. (It's a paraphrase of 2 Cor. 1:9-11.) "But this happened that you might not rely on yourself but on God, who (just in case you've forgotten) RAISES THE DEAD!! He has delivered you from such a deadly peril, and will deliver you. On Him you have set your hope that He will continue to deliver you as we help you by our prayers. Then many will give thanks on your behalf for the gracious favor granted you in answer to the prayers of many."

Love and blessings in Christ,
Ruth Stingley